I enjoy social media as a way of connecting and reconnecting with people. Many friends, including our millenial-generation kids, have bailed on Facebook but may use a variety of social media for business purposes. None of it seemed of any importance to our health or well-being. Lately though, I’ve come to realize how different the situation is for the age group that society most needs to protect. The sharp edges of social media are only beginning to surface as time works generational change.
Several months ago I learned about a book The Anxious Generation by one of my favourite author’s, social psychologist Jonathan Haidt. If you’ve seen the documentary Social Dilemma on Netflix you’ll be familiar with the theme. Starting when smart phones began to reach very large numbers around 2012 – 2015, rates of anxiety, depression and self-harm among young people took a sharp turn upwards. Haidt persuasively links the two. His concern is that without stronger social norms and government regulation, this trend will continue to worsen.
For those who haven’t read the book, there’s a Huberman Lab podcast and YouTube video of an interview with Haidt. Although pro-technology, he expands on this “great rewiring of childhood” and advocates for very specific remedies: no smartphones before high school; no social media until 16 with enforcement of age verification; and phone-free schools. The latter has begun to be implemented in some jurisdictions, including BC. Interestingly, he also advocates for far more independence, free play and responsibility for kids in the real world. (See letgrow.org)
I was curious to know what parents and communities are thinking and doing about all this. During a recent Victoria Multifaith Society meeting on Social Media, I sat with a few members of the Hindu community, who shared that their own family had developed robust, common sense rules. No phones at the dinner table; no phones in the bedroom; no screens, including TV screens, until a certain age. They spoke of a “phone daycare” at school, where smartphones are kept safely out of reach.
It turns out that more than one faith community has been grappling with the problem. During the meeting, Rabbi Matthew Ponak pulled out a “dumbphone” explaining that it can do calls and has GPS but not social media. These are becoming increasingly popular among parents who are concerned about preserving the mental and physical health of their kids but also consider a cell phone to be a crucial line of communication with them.
Well-known for its focus on family life, the LDS (Mormon) community developed a set of excellent guidelines years ago, basically encouraging their youth to avoid harmful content, use social media for good purposes, and to set boundaries in their own lives around screen time.
In my own Bahá’í community, guidance from the international level was received in 2019. It recommended that the general precepts Bahá’ís follow in their interactions with others should be even more scrupulously followed when it comes to social media:
"These precepts include the prohibition on backbiting, the counsel to see the world with their own eyes and not through the eyes of others, the need to uphold the oneness of humanity and avoid a mind-set of “us” and “them”, and the principles of consultation and the necessary decorum associated with it." ((Universal House of Justice, 1 Dec. 2019 letter to Baha'i National Assemblies.)
Especially for those aged 10 to 15, the opinions of peers has an enormous impact on self-image and mental health. In order to develop effective social norms around social media, parents, schools and communities need to have a conversation discussing risks and remedies, large and small. Further legislation may or may not be enacted, but social norms are where it all starts.
Sheila Flood is the E.D. of the Victoria Multifaith Society and member of the Bahá’í community.
You can read more articles on our interfaith blog, Spiritually Speaking at https://www.timescolonist.com/blogs/spiritually-speaking
