As we move deeper and deeper into the festive season, let’s pause to embrace those annual moments where we celebrate the joy of tight knit company with one another — in the mall parking lot.
I’ve witnessed about half a dozen really joyous events this time of year around parking a car in a shopping mall lot.
Three which stand out are:
The advance shopping scout manoeuvre: wherein a passenger from a car hops out after spotting an empty space several rows away and then runs to that spot, blocking access to other vehicles until their own car can make it around.
That particular one ended badly for the scout. A vehicle that was closer to the open spot, and therefore to my mind, rightly entitled to park, was blocked by the scout blithely standing in place refusing to move.
Remember though, it’s Christmastime in a mall parking lot. Anything goes.
The driver seeking the spot was undeterred by a mere human body being in his way and pushed forward with slow but Rudolph-like determination. The scout struck back with several well placed handbag shots to the hood, but in the end had to relent to the car’s superiority. Words of seasonal joy were shared by all.
The butt in, it’s all about me, manoeuvre: Driver A sees a person leaving a space and waits, which often seems like an eternity, as the person leaving is either catching up on some social media or finishing their latte first.
When the space is finally open, driver B appears from nowhere, whips in from the other direction, blocking out driver A and grabbing the space.
Key to this manoeuvre is for driver B to exit his vehicle quickly then pretend like driver A (or anyone else) never existed.
But some Christmas parking lot predators can see through that type of “if I don’t look at you — you can’t see me” camouflage. Driver A sprang. Blows rained down.
When I returned from my own errand, both drivers were sitting in the back of police cars.
The stand-off manoeuvre: Two drivers spot an open space and try to turn in at the same time. Neither can fit til the other backs off and no one is backing off — a la George Costanza from Seinfeld.
I can’t provide a verdict on that one. They were still sitting there as I pulled out onto the street four or five minutes later. I guess the upside was no apparent blood shed.
Most experienced drivers have come across, or been involved in, similar scenarios and the season of joy amplifies all of it.
However, there’s a decidedly serious side to all of this.
There’s nearly 100,000 parking lot crashes in this province every year. That’s a lot of often costly damage to repair, time wasted in pursuing claims and worst of all — bodies to potentially mend.
In busy times, forget about parking as close to the mall doors as possible. Grab the first available spot you can see. You could have walked in and found that tacky Christmas sweater by the time you finish wedging your way around for 15 or more minutes looking for the perfect parking space.
Park properly. Having your tires over top of the painted lines between stalls is like giving the finger to someone. It also increases the likelihood of an expensive door ding or worse if someone is really ticked by how you parked.
Don’t rely on your backup camera alone to pull out or back up. They are a great invention but there are still blindspots. Your head should be on a near 360 degree swivel, actually looking and using mirrors, when backing.
The rules require a driver, anywhere, to reverse in safety. You back into another car or a person — you own it.
Slow down. A slower driving strategy applies everywhere, including parking lots. It’s a weekly event for me to see someone going way past the level of being prudent while inside a busy parking lot.
You don’t have to be over the speed limit to be issued a ticket either. B.C. rules require that your speed be reasonable for traffic and weather conditions regardless of the local limits.
When leaving a parking lot you have two duties to yield. One is that you must stop before driving over a sidewalk and entering the street. Secondly you must yield to pedestrians and vehicles on that through street — even if there is no stop sign.
The last thing anyone needs at Christmas is wading through a motor vehicle accident claim.
A little thought to prevention and avoiding these problems in the first place are the best options to get back home in time for that eggnog.
