This year is an election year in British Columbia, which means there is a pretty good chance you will be asked to participate in a survey four or five hundred times before Oct. 19.
Basically, a survey is a method of gathering information using answers to relevant questions from a sample of the population who really just want to sit down and enjoy their dinner instead of answering survey questions.
Surveys not only provide a critical source of data and insights to help keep survey researchers employed, but also provide something for politicians to angrily denounce on talk radio programs.
Which brings us to this early stage of the election cycle, when universities, political think tanks and other research agencies are fine-tuning statistically sound methods to get to the bottom of one of the most important issues facing Western democracy: Are you a cat person or a dog person?
A surprising number of studies are conducted on this topic every year, which makes me think maybe we should tighten up the guidelines for awarding research grants.
For now, let’s delve into the treasure trove of pet-related insights gathered by psychologists, the same people who invented painful electroshock therapy and Jordan Peterson.
According to a 2018 Mars Petcare survey of 1,000 dog owners and 1,000 cat owners, dog people earn an average yearly income $47,000 higher than cat people.
Dog owners also spend 33% more on clothes and accessories for their pets and 26% more on entertainment for themselves than cat owners. This seems self-evident: Most cats aren’t going to sit around while you dress them in a pirate costume, and they definitely will ghost you and your Friday evening plans for wine and tapas.
The same survey found cat owners are more likely to enjoy documentaries, musicals, books and gardening than dog owners, who prefer action movies, travelling, and a more active lifestyle that includes running, dancing and bending over to pick up dog poo every damn day.
The notion that cat owners are more intelligent and creative, while dog owners are more likely to eat the sofa was also revealed in a 2017 study by a trio of psychologists from the University of Florida, Carroll University, and Marquette University.
In that study, cat people scored higher in a test for reasoning, and also proved better at abstract thought, self-reliance, and open-mindedness EXCEPT WHEN THE LASER POINTER IS ON THE FLOOR HAHAHAHA I’M GOING TO GET YOU … Sorry, where was I? Oh yes: Dog people were more likely to have warm, extroverted personalities, be quite rule-conscious, and enjoy a good belly rub.
Interestingly, the study found no significant differences between cat owners and dog owners with respect to anxiety and neuroticism, which is a nice way to say “cuckoo-for-coconuts-crazy.”
This probably matches your own lived experience. I’ll bet you know at least one crazy cat lady AND somebody who describes him/herself as a dog’s “dad/mom,” which is biologically impossible.
You know a nutty pet owner because there are a LOT of people with pets out there. In Canada, 77% of households own at least one kind, the most popular being the domestic cat. In 2022, there were 8.5 million pet cats in the country, and another 300 million feral cats living out behind my house, if the nighttime serenading is anything to go by.
Cats are a popular choice of pet because they have an independent nature and can happily coexist in a smaller living space, without a yard. They don’t need to be exercised, and they don’t need much attention except for when they do. All cats ask for in return is a little food and water, and that you don’t mind the overpowering odour of urine in your carpet, furniture, clothing and hair.
Dogs are the second most popular pet in Canada. In 2022, there were 7.9 million pet dogs, most of which are owned by extroverts, super happy to be outside walking their pet, hoping for a long conversation with other dog owners. Or cat owners. Or giraffe owners. Really, anybody at all up for a nice chat. For them, the likelihood of being extensively sniffed, licked and having terrible things done to a lower leg is just a happy side-benefit.
Quebecers are more likely to have cats than dogs (67% compared to 48%), which I think Anglophones always suspected: Cats are French.
In British Columbia, Northern Canada and the prairie provinces, there are more dog owners than cat owners, while the split is even in Ontario and Atlantic Canada.
Given all of the pet-owning personality insights listed above, by now most readers will have self-identified as either a dog person or a cat person, with a corresponding likelihood of voting one way or another in British Columbia’s coming election.
I won’t suggest who you will vote for given that identification. I have a very good reason for not spelling out a clear correlation between pet preference and political partiality. The reason is that I am an idiot. Also, I am not a qualified political scientist.
Like many other not-qualified political scientists, I am more concerned with the swing voters! You know, the people who own pet fish (12% of Canadian households), pet birds (5%), rabbits and hamsters (2%), and the secretive “miscellaneous other” pet owners (1%) who prefer horses, lizards, guinea pigs, frogs, snakes, ferrets, gerbils, turtles and spiders.
Who knows how those weirdos will vote.
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